YOU HAVE MY ATTENTION

A couple days ago, the first trailer for NBC's Day One was "leaked". And by leaked, I mean was released by someone with access to a decent quality version. Here's the show in a nutshell, from NBC.com:

In the aftermath of a global event that devastates the world's infrastructures, a small band of [sexy] survivors strives to rebuild society and unravel the mysteries of why the event took place and what the future has in store.

Told from the point of view of an eclectic [read: there's an Asian guy and a black chick] group of neighbors in a Van Nuys, California apartment building, this journey of survival will show us that hope is found in the smallest of victories and heroes are born every day.

As the headline suggests, I was impressed by this trailer. The special effects especially. I would like to direct your attention to a few key moments.

1:01- Hilarious pratfall.
1:06- Riling up the 9/11 survivors.
1:34- The great Xander Berkley.
2:10-14- The gag-worthy tagline.
2:23- Horrible fake CPR.

Keep an eye on this one. Unfortunately it doesn't premiere until March of 2010, so you'll have to think of something else to do in the mean time. I suggest finding a hobby. Do people still collect things? Stamps? Post cards? Lady's fingers? Up to you.

PUT ON SOME UNDERWEAR, I CAN SEE YOUR CLIPS

Clip of the week comes early this week, because this was just too good not to share immediately. Maybe you remember stories like Little Red Riding Hood, Jack and the Beanstalk, Cinderella, Snow White, and other Mother Goose yarns. Wouldn't it be great to see them in cartoon form? Been there done that, you say? Seen it? Well not like this you haven't. It's called Once Upon a Girl and I would buy it, but I'd rather wait for the Blu Ray. I like my antiquated porn to have as much resolution as possible.

Not funny actor gets not funny sitcom

Jon Heder, who has done basically nothing since criminally overrated "Napoleon Dynamite" has apparently landed a deal to star in a ten-episode series on Comedy Central about a nerd. What range. The details:

"Napoleon Dynamite" star Jon Heder has landed a sitcom deal at Comedy Central.

The network has ordered 10 episodes of a new scripted comedy starring Heder as an out of work computer IT specialist who returns to his small home town and moves back in with his parents and younger brother.

The project is from Gary Sanchez Productions and Debmar-Mercury.

My how the not mighty have remained completely stationary in... not mighty-tude... Don't ask me what the title of this show is, since apparently it doesn't have one. Since there is nothing funny about Jon Heder, and there is nothing inherently funny about an out of work nerd living with his parents, I can probably safely take a pass on this show. If I want to experience the magic of a loser who hangs out in a basement and plays video games, I have my own life.

[Ed.- He failed to mention the show is being produced and written by Chris Henchy (HBO's Eastbound and Down), Adam McKay (Anchorman, Stepbrothers), and Will Ferrell (Saturday Night Live and I think that's it). Heder doesn't exactly light my fire either, but those other guys are like Zippos. -Mike]

via The Live Feed

Yeah I watched ABC Family, wanna fight about it?

I hope everyone had a good long weekend, I know I did. Contrary to internet rumor, bambat still exists, and is back from our brief vacation from our unpaid non-job. We're kicking off a new segment today: Pilot Impressions. This seems pretty self-explanatory, but for you morons: We watch pilots of new shows. We write about them. The end. Since this is the Summer, most of these shows are going to be terrible. That's just how it goes.

First up is a little show we previewed a while back, ABC Family's re-boot of 10 Things I Hate About You. So you can get your giggles out of the way upfront: Yes, I programmed my DVR to record this program. Yes, I then watched this program. And yes, I am now going to spend my time writing about it. Whoever told you I had a life was obviously misinformed.

Anyway, if you've seen the movie from back when Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles' career were both still alive, then you've basically seen the pilot. And by that I mean that they essentially took the exact same plot and re-filmed it with less talented actors. They also made sure to modernize it with topical contemporary references to texting and Facebook. No mention of the big gossip that someone tweeted yet, but it's only a matter of time.

Keep in mind that this is an adaptation of a movie which was a loose adaptation of a Shakespeare play in the first place. In other words, we've reached the maximum saturation point of being derivative. If this show gets a spin-off, God will kill an autustic kitten. It goes without saying that each iteration was worst than the last, and yes, this was pretty bad.

The cast is full of people I don't recognize, which is just as well considering a quick glance at their imdb entries revealed a litany of prior ABC Family appearances. I think it should be a law that if you have two or more Hannah Montana alums in one place at any time, you have to pay a fine to the FCC. The only one I knew was Dana Davis, who was in Heroes briefly. She wasn't any good here either. That said, there was definitely some jailbait talent here, which those who know me are aware is a key factor.

Anyway, I can't waste another minute writing about this. In summation:

Rating: 3 out of 10

Wasn't funny or clever. Some of the chicks were alright looking. Didn't throw my remote.

Odds I'll watch another episode: 0

Odds I'll watch another episode and not tell anyone: 50/50

After all, let's face it, I have no life.

CLIP IT IN THE BUD

Slow day today. It's a holiday after all. This is your weekly clip post.

One of Alec Baldwin's funniest scenes on 30 Rock:

The Summer of Couch Part IV: It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Note: This is part four in our ongoing series The Summer of Couch


Show: It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia
Network: FX
Still on Air: Yes
Seasons: Four (Fifth premiers in the fall)
Episodes I got through: All of them
Rating: 5/5

What I Loved: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is one of those shows that people have been telling me for years that I have to see. I've caught episodes here or there, but it never really got me hooked. The Summer of Couch provided me with an excellent opportunity to prove myself wrong, and did I ever. I've gone through the entire four seasons over the last week or so, only stopping to tend to the basic necessities of life. To call the comedy brilliant wouldn't be doing it justice, the show my be a bit slapstick and over the top at times, but its one of the funniest shows I've ever seen. And that's really all a comedy should be. There's no real progression in the story, no real character development, and yet somehow it doesn't matter: Because you can't stop laughing the entire time. It might not be the best comedy on TV, but it is without a doubt the most outrageously funny. The episodes are also so self-contained with the outrageous schemes of the gang that they're basically endlessly re-watchable. And I plan to re-watch them. Endlessly.

What I Hated: Really, nothing. The characters of Dee and Mac aren't quite as funny as the other three, but it really only seems that way because the others are so unbelievably brilliant. The show can be a bit too low-brow at times, but at this point we're really just splitting hairs.

The Verdict: Plainly, I loved it. It seems so far in the Summer of Couch that I'm either loving these shows or hating them. Hopefully soon I will have a completely ambivalent reaction to one, but its not today. It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia is unbelievably fantastic. Its recently been renewed for several more seasons at 13 episodes each (really the perfect number, since it never feels like they're reaching to come up with a plot) so the show will be around to enjoy for a while longer. Thanks to all those who recommended this show, it was well worth it.

Clip:

The Emmys gets one right

Usually when I think about the Emmys, the first words that pop into my head are "poor decisions". After all, these are the awards which have given three consecutive wins to Jeremy Piven and also once nominated Evangeline Lilly. So its refreshing to hear that CBS is currently in talks with friend of the blog Neil Patrick Harris to host the awards show. Variety has the details:

Thesp [ed: Thespian] Neil Patrick Harris is in the midst of cutting a deal with CBS and the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences to host the 61st annual kudos [ed: awards ceremony] on Sept. 20. Insiders cautioned that the deal is not yet completed, but all sides are working toward setting Harris as this year's Emmycast frontman as soon as possible.

---

Having Harris front and center on the kudocast [ed: awards ceremony] will amount to a promo boost for "Mother," which is set to move into the 8 p.m. anchor slot of the Eye's Monday comedy block the night after the Emmys.

The pressure is on this year's Emmycast exec producer, Don Mischer, to improve the ratings and the critical reception to this year's show. Last year's Primetime Emmy Awards were widely panned for the decision to use five reality show personalities [ed: vapid morons] as co-hosts.

You'll notice I had to clean it up a little, since Variety still hasn't figured out they're supposed to be an actual entertainment news source, not my 12 year old cousin's myspace. Following Harris' successful stint as the host of the Tonys (that's the one about plays), this seems like a no-brainer decision. What would make this all the sweeter is if Harris pairs the hosting gig with a win as best supporting actor, as bambat predicted. That would be legen... wait for it...

...
dary! Legendary.

UPDATE: It's a done deal.

via Variety

HEADLINES: IS IT LAST WEEK ALREADY? EDITION

Can you spot an old friend in this picture? The hint is tattoo.

Meloni, Hargitay seal deal with 'SVU'- Do we really have to go through this every year? It's like when Vin Diesel teased us by stepping away from the Fast and Furious franchise. We know you've got nothing else. (Variety)

Final 'Lost' season gains an hour- But the clock on the microwave is still wrong. (Live Feed)

Joanna 'Idol' Regrets- #1: Doing it in the first place. #2: Under-the-table handjobs for Simon Cowell. #3: Herpes.(NY Post)

Meet the `Big Brother 11' cast- You know, before they get really famous. (Philly.com)

30 Rock Keeps the Awkward Laughs Coming- This season they'll be reading excerpts from Brett's diary before commercials. Sample: Today on the metro I saw this chick who totally looked just like Number Six. I'd totally give her my 5" if you know what I'm sayin'. (TV.com)


Here's a little treat if you spotted our old friend keyboard cat.

Not Interested to join the cast of Don't Care

From the further annals of "Good God Nothing Is Going On This Week" comes a thoroughly underwhelming bit of casting news. Hilary Duff, who you might remember as the 11th most famous late-teen/early-twenty-something actress/singer/annoying attention whore to come out during the late 1990s/early 2000s when those sorts of people were all the rage is joining the cast of Gossip Girl, which you might remember as that show which sucks. From Ausiello:

The actress-designer-pop chanteuse will play Olivia Burke, a movie star who enrolls at NYU in search of a traditional college experience. She ends up rooming with Vanessa (Jessica Szohr) so it's safe to say she'll be majoring in Drama!

Duff will debut in this season's fourth episode, slated to air Oct. 5.

Gossip producers spotted an opening in Duff's schedule after NBC passed on her comedy pilot Barely Legal.

Really? Olivia Burke? If you were to ask me, a heterosexual male who has never seen a single minute of Gossip Girl, to guess what the creators of this show would name a character, my first guess would be Olivia Burke. That's possibly the most generic "bitch" name of all time, I'm amazed they didn't already have a character named that. Apparently they were saving it for a "big get" like Hilary Duff. Smooth operating, creators of this terrible CW show, smooth operating. Now back to your regularly scheduled boredom.

[Ed note: Here's Hilary Duff wet. Why not? - mike]




via Ausiello

Not even outer space is safe from angsty melodrama

In the wake of the tease that was Virtuality airing on FOX comes news that ABC will pick up another high-concept Summer sci-fi show which may sate the nerd appetite (but probably not). Defying Gravity had me all excited until I read that the producer is one of the people behind Grey's Anatomy and Ugly Betty. In his own words:

"Since we originally pitched "Gravity" to the international marketplace as 'Gray's Anatomy' in space, getting the series on the network that has 'Grey's' and makes the most successful sci-fi show on TV in 'Lost' is a good fit," FtvS executive vp David Madden said. He describes the show as "having a sci-fi premise but being told in a female-friendly way."

Yeah, so fuck that. It may have Ron Livingston, who is awesome, but "Grey's Anatomy in Space"? Pass. Thanks a lot ABC for getting me unreasonably excited by a headline and lead actor only to take the wind out of my sails entirely. I looked around for a trailer though there doesn't seem to be one. Not that I'd want to see it now anyway. One day, someone will find a successful vehicle for Ron Livingston, but it is not this day. Now if they come up with a show that involves sending the cast of Grey's Anatomy IN TO space, then I'll clear some room on my DVR.


via The Live Feed